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Parent's Guide to Fraternities
"We come to college not alone to prepare to make a living but to learn to live a life." As a parent, you are undoubtedly concerned about your son's college experience and the choices he will make. This page is designed to answer some of the questions you may have about fraternity membership. For your son, making the transition form high school or a community college to a four-year college or university may seem like an imposing challenge. One or more of the following questions may be on his mind:
Fraternities exists as a proven support network for your son as he embarks on this new period in his life. Over 400,000 students across the country are currently fraternity members. The fraternity can help personalize your son's college experience by offering a scholastic support system; hands-on experience in leading committees, managing budgets, and interacting with faculty and administrators; exposure to potential careers through educational programs and discussions with alumni; offering the chance to give back to the community through service projects; and creating close friendships with men that will cheer him on when times are tough. With all these opportunities available, it is no wonder that fraternity members tend to graduate from college at a significantly higher rate than those not involved in fraternities. Aren't fraternities just like the one shown in the movie "Animal House?" Nobody likes stereotypes. The best way to know a fraternity is to get to know its members. Fraternities are made up of a wide variety of undergraduate students, along with thousands of alumni brothers, each one a unique individual. At the heart of every fraternity is a set of value-based principles related to the development of character, leadership, scholarship, service, and lifelong friendship. The code of ethics for which many fraternities and sororities strive are represented as follows: Basic Expectations for Fraternal Membership
The Basic Expectations talk about alcohol. What is it really like in the fraternity? Alcohol abuse is unhealthy and inconsistent with fraternity ideals. All fraternities are expected to uphold state and city laws, university, fraternity, and IFC (the governing boards for fraternities) policies regarding consumption of alcohol. In addition, fraternities are not allowed to purchase alcohol for members or guests. The days of open keg parties at Greek social functions are gone. Instead, you'll find fraternity members participating in alcohol-free social activities like moonlight bowling, dinner exchanges, and lip sync contests. Students who choose not to drink will know that it's ok and feel comfortable with their decision. I'm concerned about my son's grades - what impact would fraternity membership have? Students often find it difficult to manage their time when moving from the highly structured high school environment to the freedoms of college. Fraternities assist in that transition by offering scholarship programs which may include study partners, mandatory study hours, and time management workshops. Your son can access and network with members who already know how to use campus resources like the library, tutors, computer labs, study lounges, and academic advisors. While fraternities are concerned about members' academic achievement, your son is still ultimately responsible for utilizing the resources made available. What about pledging or hazing? New fraternity members all experience a period of orientation. During this time, your son and other new members will participate in leadership retreats, community service projects, weekly meetings to learn about the university and the fraternity history, and activities designed to build friendships among new members and the initiated members. ALL FRATERNITY POLICIES FORBID HAZING, and all organizations' chapters are committed to a membership education period which instills a sense of responsibility and commitment in the new members. This period will assist your son in overcoming some of their concerns about success in college. Who is actually "in charge" of the fraternity or sorority? Fraternity members are elected to officer positions and manage the day-to-day operations of the organization. These officers are assisted by members serving on committees and by alumni serving as advisors. All of our fraternities are also part of an (inter) national organization that offers support, advice, and direction through paid professional staff members and regional volunteers. Professional university staff are also employed to assist, educate, and monitor the activities of fraternities. Doesn't it cost a lost of money to be in a fraternity? Each fraternity is self-supported through dues charged to all members. In the first year of membership, a few one-time expenses are assessed. After those initial payments are made, your son's only expense will be his regular dues. Being in a fraternity sounds like it takes a lot of time. Participating in any worthwhile activity always requires an investment of one's time. Research has shown that involved college students are more likely to graduate, and they report greater satisfaction with their college experience. Through his fraternity involvement, your son will learn how to balance their academics, work, campus involvement, and social commitments. How does my son go about joining a fraternity? Fraternities utilize a process commonly referred to as "recruitment" or "rush" in order to meet prospective members. Recruitment offers non-affiliated students an opportunity to meet a number of other people on campus and learn what each group has to offer. "Rushees" (as prospective members are called) are encouraged to ask questions and secure answers to each question from several members. Just like researching, visiting, and choosing a university, your son should seek out the fraternity that best fits his personality, needs, and desires. He will find that there is a place for everyone. What is my role as a parent? Be supportive and learn as much as you can by asking questions of your son as he meets people through the recruitment process. Many groups will provide written statements concerning activities, finances, and policies; your son should be encouraged to obtain and read this information. How Your Son Can Benefit From Fraternity Membership:
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